Summer Activities for Stay at Home Kids – What is worth the price and hassle?

This summer marks the first time I have both of my littles (almost 3 and almost 5) home with me all summer. I was worried we wouldn’t have enough to do, so I followed the lead of many stay-at-home moms from their school and signed them up for summer camps, pool passes, and memberships. However, I’m not exactly a full-time stay-at-home mom. While I do stay home, I also work 1 to 3 hours a day.

Many stay-at-home moms seem to believe their kids need to be busy every day, but I’ve found that this often stems from their own need for mental engagement. Here’s what I’ve learned about kids’ activities this summer:

Swim Lessons vs. Pool Passes
Swim lessons haven’t been useful for my two sons, both of whom are afraid of water. On the other hand, pool passes have been more beneficial. The time spent at the pool is making them more comfortable with water. Once they overcome their fear, swim lessons might become more effective.

Memberships: Hit and Miss
Zoo Membership: Our local zoo is tiny and takes about an hour to get through. Honestly, we have more fun at the local park.
Living History Farms: Unless there’s an event, it’s not worth visiting.
Science Center: This membership is fantastic. My kids love exploring the different sections and never seem to tire of it. It’s perfect for cold, rainy, or hot days year-round.

Summer Camps
The one camp we tried was awesome. While camps are expensive, we might do another one next year, possibly a science center camp. However, I don’t see myself doing more than one or two camps per summer at this age. My kids can have fun in the backyard with a sprinkler or at a park.

Here are a few considerations:

Time with Friends: They need social interaction. I’m willing to pay for activities like summer camp if it means they can see their friends.
Time at the Pool: While I find the pool annoying and crowded, I think learning to swim is important. My goal is to get them comfortable through exposure, then we’ll consider lessons again next year.
Down Time: Kids don’t need to be busy all the time. Over-scheduling can be a waste of money and may do more harm than good.

Finding the right balance of activities is crucial. Not every activity needs to be structured or expensive. Sometimes, the simplest activities bring the most joy and benefit to our children. As parents, we need to recognize that downtime is just as important as planned activities, allowing our kids to grow, learn, and enjoy their summer. As long as we can make times with their friends, that is really all they truly need over the summer.

Navigating the Midlife Funk: Finding Excitement in Everyday Life

Have you ever felt like you’re in a daze, wondering where life is heading and struggling to find excitement? As a married parent, this feeling can be particularly perplexing. We hear about midlife crises, but the emotions that come with this stage of life are often left unspoken. It can feel like we’re just watching the world age around us, and it’s hard to know how to break free from this funk.

I wouldn’t say I’m depressed, just underwhelmed by life. Is this it? I work from home and take care of my kids, which is a blessing, but this life can also be a bit monotonous. My husband works long hours and is frequently stressed by the huge demands of his day. I hate seeing him that way. Is this just where we stay until we retire? Literally nothing interesting or exciting happens to us, ever. We do leave the house, but is this how people spend their lives with kids at home?

The Midlife Funk: What’s Going On?
It’s not uncommon to feel this way. Many of us enter a stage where the thrill of new experiences seems to fade, replaced by the routines of daily life. As we age, our responsibilities grow, and the spontaneity of our youth often takes a backseat to obligations and schedules. It’s easy to fall into a pattern where days blur together, leaving us feeling underwhelmed and questioning if this is all there is.

Rediscovering Joy: Small Steps to Big Changes
Embrace New Hobbies: Trying something new can inject excitement into your life. Whether it’s a creative pursuit like painting or writing, a physical activity like hiking or yoga, or even learning a new skill, exploring new interests can reignite a sense of curiosity and joy.

Reconnect with Nature: Spending time outdoors can be incredibly refreshing. Whether it’s a walk in the park, a family hike, or even just sitting in your backyard, nature has a way of calming the mind and providing a new perspective.

Plan Mini Adventures: You don’t need a grand vacation to create memorable experiences. Plan small outings or day trips that break the routine and offer something to look forward to. Discover local attractions, visit a nearby town, or find a new restaurant to try.

Prioritize Self-Care: Taking care of yourself is crucial. Whether it’s through exercise, meditation, reading, or simply taking a few minutes each day to relax, self-care can help rejuvenate your spirit and improve your overall well-being.

Create Family Traditions: Introducing new traditions or reviving old ones can bring joy and a sense of anticipation. Whether it’s a weekly movie night, a monthly game night, or seasonal activities, these moments can create lasting memories and strengthen family bonds.

Navigating Together: Supporting Each Other
It’s important to acknowledge your feelings and communicate them with your partner. Working together to find ways to bring more excitement into your lives can be incredibly supportive. Plan date nights, engage in shared hobbies, or simply take time to talk about your dreams and aspirations.

Looking Forward: Finding Hope in the Everyday
While it’s easy to feel like life is passing by, remember that each day offers opportunities for new experiences and growth. It’s about finding joy in the little things and embracing the present moment.

Life with kids at home doesn’t have to be monotonous. By taking small steps to break the routine, you can find excitement and fulfillment in everyday life. It’s okay to feel underwhelmed at times, but know that you have the power to create a life that feels vibrant and meaningful.

We Got a Dog!

We got a dog! Well, we don’t have her yet, but we bring her home in 1.5 weeks. I’ve been feeling quite bored with life and a bit sad about moving on from the baby stage with my boys. Recently, we visited a farm with puppies, and I found myself yearning for a dog. At first, I tried to push this desire aside, thinking it was an irrational response to my feelings of discontentment.

But my wonderful husband, knowing my desire, got me a dog for my birthday, and I am over the moon. I realized after holding her that I’m not necessarily just sad about moving to a new stage in life; I have a strong desire to be surrounded by more life. I love dogs and children, and I’ve even considered getting chickens, although I think that will come when we eventually live somewhere with more land.

Anyway, we are getting a dog! The kids are so excited, and I just can’t wait to be a dog mom again. This new addition to our family brings so much joy and anticipation. It’s incredible how the prospect of a furry friend has lifted my spirits and given me something wonderful to look forward to.

For anyone feeling a similar sense of boredom or sadness, sometimes a change like this, something that brings more life and joy into your home, can make all the difference. Whether it’s a dog, a cat, or even chickens, adding a new member to the family can be incredibly fulfilling.

Stay tuned for updates on our new furry friend and the adventures we’re sure to have together. Here’s to new beginnings and embracing the joyful chaos of life with kids and pets! Along those lines, our new litte fur-child is coming with the name Nova which means new and bright/light. How perfect is this name for what we are feeling?! We will definitely be sticking with this name.

Embracing Contradictions: The Complex Desires of A Late 30-Something Woman

I frequently find myself grappling with opposing desires. At times, I wonder if this is a result of being a woman, being overly emotional, or perhaps just the nature of modern parenthood. I often yearn for things that are in direct conflict with each other.

For instance, I want another baby, maybe even two more. Yet, I dread the thought of being pregnant again and would love to skip past the first two years of sleepless nights and constant crying. The reality is, I desire the joy and fulfillment that another child could bring, but I am acutely aware of the financial cost and added stress it would entail.

Then there’s the idea of having backyard chickens. The thought of fresh eggs and a little slice of rural life in our backyard is appealing. However, I worry that our small yard wouldn’t accommodate them well, and the cost might outweigh the benefits. Plus, I dislike feeling tied down to our house, which is exactly what chickens would do.

While we’re on this topic, I also want a dog. The companionship and joy a dog could bring to our family is tempting, but I hesitate at the thought of added expenses, scratched floors, and rugs ruined by potty training accidents.

Some days, I dream of having all these things and embracing the extra responsibilities they bring. Other days, I crave a carefree lifestyle where I’m not tied down and can move about whenever and wherever I please. Yet, with two young kids and a husband who works in an office and rarely takes vacations, being tied down is my current reality.

So, why do I keep entertaining these ideas? Perhaps it’s because I recognize that while my life is already filled with responsibilities, adding something new could bring joy and fulfillment that outweigh the drawbacks. In a way, these conflicting desires highlight a deeper truth about parenting and life in general: it’s a constant balancing act between what we want and what we can realistically manage.

In conclusion, it’s okay to have opposing desires and to dream of a life that seems contradictory. Embracing these contradictions is part of the journey, and it’s through this process that we often find what truly matters to us. Whether or not I ever get the chickens, the dog, or another baby, I think it is probably just important to embrace where we are now in our lives and be open to opportunities as they may arise. I think I am done trying to have control all of time. I just want to be open to whatever presents itself in this beautiful crazy life.

Finding Balance or Throwing it Out Entirely

Life is a constant juggle between competing ideologies, especially for those of us who are deeply passionate about various subjects. I often find myself torn between conflicting schools of thought, each championing their own way of living as the ultimate path to fulfillment. For example, as someone who dives deep into the nuances of nutrition, I’ve explored everything from Dr. Joel Fuhrman’s whole foods, plant-based Nutritarian diet to high-protein and meat-centric regimens promoted by fitness enthusiasts. My current approach is a blend of whole foods, high plant-based intake, moderate protein, and regenerative meat, yet it still feels like I’m not hitting the mark perfectly. But today, my mind is occupied with a broader and more pressing issue: the quest for balance versus the pursuit of singular passion.

Many advocate for spending more time with family, suggesting that this is the key to true happiness. They warn against dedicating one’s life solely to the pursuit of wealth, only to realize too late that it was a fruitless endeavor. Conversely, figures like David Goggins and Cameron Hanes promote an all-in mentality, urging us to pour every ounce of our energy into perfecting a craft, arguing that this pursuit is the only path to a meaningful life. Both perspectives resonate with me, yet they seem irreconcilable. On one hand, there’s the call to find joy in life’s simple moments with loved ones. On the other, there’s the drive to achieve greatness through relentless dedication to a single pursuit.

The common thread in both ideologies is the search for external meaning. Whether it’s through family or personal achievement, the aim is to find something that gives our lives purpose. At times, I entertain the idea of blending the two approaches. I could dedicate myself to something I find deeply meaningful, but who would take care of my children in the meantime? Perhaps my children themselves are my life’s work. The thought of homeschooling appeals to me—teaching them hard work, grit, and resilience. Yet, I’m not entirely convinced this would fulfill me completely.

I work as a financial planner, a job I love, but the more I immerse myself in it, the more I feel I’m taking time away from my children. Similarly, my interests in nutrition, fitness, and cooking are driven by a desire to stay healthy for my active lifestyle and my family, not as standalone passions. So, where do I go from here? What should I do? For now, I take it one day at a time. I believe the key lies in being fully present in each moment. When I work, I’m wholly focused on my tasks. When I’m with my kids, they have my undivided attention.

I’ve simplified my nutrition by sticking to the same meals until dinner. My workouts follow a consistent weekly routine and I have been adding to it now that my kids are out of school for the summer. I’m also exploring mobility exercises, starting with “Body by Breath” by Jill Miller. Despite this, my to-do list remains long. Is this balance, or a lack of focus and meaning?

Many of my friends work long hours in jobs they dislike, justifying the sacrifice with the financial rewards. I know this isn’t the answer. They will likely regret missing their children’s childhoods. I work part-time from home, a privilege I cherish, but it comes with its own set of doubts. Is the pursuit of meaningful work the missing piece for those working long hours? Can kids be the sole source of meaning in life?

When my first child was a baby, I worked full-time, and he went to daycare. I didn’t mind being away because I am not cut out for dealing with constant crying 24-7. Losing that same job after my second child was born was a horrible feeling of loss, despite my distane for the mundane work. I’m in a better place with more time for my kids and a job I find meaningful, but the paycut sucks and has affected my confidence in myself. There still a nagging feeling that something is missing. What is that thing? I don’t have that answer, but here is what I know for sure:

Having my kids home feels right 100% of the time. Since ending daycare and starting part-time preschool, the time I have with my kids has been incredible. It’s challenging, but never not worth it.
My work aligns with my passions. I love helping people with their finances. However, I struggle to make time for studying for my certification because I don’t feel that it is a priority and I need to reassess my purpose there.
Financial constraints are a challenge. I don’t feel deprived, but I know I’m underpaid for my worth and the value I add to my current company. This will need to be addressed aftermy kids need me less. Homeschooling is still a consideration too so I don’t have a timeline with this.
Health and fitness are important to me. My workouts and nutrition are good, and I’m in decent physical shape, but not at my peak. This is an area I want to improve upon.

Finding real purpose in life is a complex and ongoing journey. I don’t have any of it figured out and I don’t pretend to. I think much of my issues stem from my perfectionist tendencies, but I think I am closer to true meaning than I have ever been before.

Embracing Summer Break: Ideas for Staying Sane with Young Kids at Home

We’re three days into my boys’ summer break from preschool, and so far, it’s been delightful. Ask me again in 14 weeks, and I might be pulling my hair out, but for now, the slow mornings and long walks are a welcome change. Here are some strategies I’m using to help us maintain our sanity throughout the summer:

Maintaining Our Morning Routine
We follow the same morning routine as during the school year. I let the boys sleep in if they’re tired, and our bedtime has shifted slightly later. However, once they wake up, we go through the same motions at a more relaxed pace. They get up, get dressed, comb their hair, brush their teeth, and then we head downstairs for breakfast. Afterward, instead of rushing to school, they enjoy a little TV time while I tackle the most demanding part of my workday.

Extended Morning Walks
I usually take a 10-minute walk every morning before work, but with no need to spend 30 minutes in the car, we now extend our walk time. We head out after I complete some hard work tasks and it is a great change of pace. These walks are a great opportunity for us to chat and enjoy the morning sun together.

Daily Outings
Every day, we make sure to get out of the house, even if it’s just a quick trip to the store. It’s important for all of us to see different faces and get a change of scenery.

Scheduled Playdates
I’ve set up playdates with other kids from school. This not only helps the boys stay connected with their friends but also gives them a chance to burn off some energy.

Lots of Outside Time
Our backyard is fenced, so I’m comfortable letting my almost 3 and almost 5-year-old play outside on their own. This gives me a chance to do some light work in the afternoon while they enjoy the playset, sandbox, garden, and even the recent puddles from the rain. They often continue playing while I make dinner. I wonder if they’ll eventually tire of the backyard, but for now, they are content for long periods.

I cherish this time together and hope that we continue to enjoy the next 13.5 weeks as much as we’ve enjoyed the first three days. This summer, I’m embracing the slower pace and finding joy in the simple moments. Whether it’s sticking to our morning routine, extending our walks, or making sure we get out of the house, these small strategies are helping us make the most of our summer break.

Balancing Career and Family: My Journey Through Uncertainty and Gratitude

Twelve days after my second son was born, I received a call from my boss’s boss. Not recognizing the number, I didn’t answer. When I called my boss to see why his boss called me, I heard the devastating news: the company I’d worked for over 12 years had laid off my entire team. We thought we were safe. Just two weeks before I delivered my son, we’d been in a meeting with everyone who was supposed to be part of the “go-forward team.” Despite the blow, I was fortunate to have seven months of severance, which allowed me to keep my son home for the full 16 weeks of my maternity leave. Afterward, he went to daycare, and I began job hunting.

For years, I’d envisioned leaving my corporate job only if I had enough money to retire or if my husband received a substantial raise. In my ideal scenario, I would work part-time at a small company, something in personal finance, giving me more time with my kids. When I reached out to a friend who worked as a financial advisor, he told me he was moving to a smaller financial firm and they were looking for a back-end financial planner. The firm was religiously affiliated and had two women employees who kept their kids at home full-time. It seemed like a perfect fit.

While it felt like a dream come true, my heart still ached. Losing my corporate job was a hard pill to swallow. I now earn about half of my previous salary, with no benefits, and work under an advisor whose arrogance is hard to bear. Life isn’t perfect anywhere, but the contrast between how great and not great everything is can be confusing.

I often wonder if leaving this job after completing my certification credentials to work full-time elsewhere for a higher salary would be the right move. However, that would likely mean less influence over client plans and reduced time with my 2- and 4-year-old sons. My husband makes good money, but he is underpaid for his qualifications and workload. If he earned 50% more, I believe I’d feel less conflicted. My dream is to work part-time but not out of necessity.

Ironically, we have enough money for me to stop working if we maintain our current expenses, but I’m not spending the way I’d like to. We prioritize high-quality food and supplements, but I’ve cut back on other areas that used to bring me joy, like getting my hair colored, nails done, and buying new clothes. Now, I shop for clothes at Costco and skip beauty treatments altogether. It feels trivial to complain about these things, but seeing friends with higher incomes living more luxuriously adds to my sense of loss. However, they too have conflicted souls. They send their kids to full-time daycare and often feel stressed by their limited time together because they need to focus on getting things done rather than spending time playing with their kids. I cherish every moment with my kids, knowing this time is fleeting, yet I’m aware of my worth and the skills I could leverage for a higher income.

Despite the unresolved feelings, one thing remains clear: I love my time with my children. I’m grateful for a job that allows me to pursue many of my passions. Every morning, as I walk in the rising sun while most people I know are stuck in Zoom meetings behind office desks, I know I’m where my heart belongs—at home, in the sunshine, with my babies.

Embracing My Inner Weirdo: The Power of Being True to Yourself and Your Family

From a young age, I’ve always gravitated towards what many might consider the unconventional or the unpopular. Growing up, this made me a bit of an outlier among my peers. I wasn’t the child who blended in easily, and I think that reality sculpted a very particular kind of resilience in me. It taught me the invaluable lesson that it’s perfectly fine not to follow the crowd. This realization has empowered me immensely as an adult, particularly in my journey as a mother.

Certainly, there were moments during my adolescence when I longed to fit in. I recall attempting to engage with the reality TV shows my peers were obsessed with, only to end up bewildered and uninterested. Even then, I was beginning to understand that fitting in just for the sake of being liked was less appealing than being true to my own tastes and interests.

As a parent, this acceptance of non-conformity has deeply influenced the choices I make for my children. I have made a few decisions for my boys that terrify me that they will be upset that they don’t fit-in later on. But, I knew when I made those decisions and I know now that I have made the best decisions for them that I could in those moments and we can adapt to their beliefs and choices as they grow. I just hope they don’t hate my one day for making a wrong choice for them.

Our family’s lifestyle also reflects our value of authenticity over social conformity. I work part-time to ensure I’m present during these formative years, and our boys attend a Montessori preschool, which we feel nurtures their individual strengths. We’re considering dual enrollment for elementary school to further tailor their educational journey. These are all things that cause quite a bit of strange comments from people who enjoys being “normal.” The only other parents who seem to understand me are those who also send their kids to same Montessori preschool.

We’ve opted out of typical vacationw and unnecessary purchases. Not because we disdain others who enjoy these things, but because it doesn’t fit with our family’s values and goals. We don’t use social media to share moments or milestones because the things we do, the travel we choose and the things we buy are purely because they are good for our family not because we care what others think about them. We share special moments on a private app for people close to use who care to see our day-to-day lives.

Looking back, I sometimes cringe at the discomforts of being the “weird kid,” but today, I’m thankful for her. She allowed me to grow into someone who values individual thought and who is comfortable making decisions that might not align with the mainstream. This sense of self, grounded in the acceptance of my quirks and the support of those who love me, underscores my contentment and confidence as a parent and individual.

In a world that often prizes conformity, choosing your own path can seem daunting. Yet, it is in this space where we find our true selves and the deepest, most meaningful way to connect with our families. After all, isn’t life about finding happiness in our unique journeys and sharing that joy with the ones we love, weird quirks and all?

5 Money Pitfalls I See Everyday as a Financial Planner

From a very young age, I learned to associate money with freedom. Growing up as an unhappy child, I learned to value of financial security as a means to freedom. This belief led me to become somewhat of a money hoarder, clinging to every dollar as a ticket to personal liberty. During my teenage years, I swayed into a period of rebellion—spending excessively, perhaps as a way to claim a slice of the freedom I so craved. However, I eventually reverted back to my cautious financial habits, embracing minimalism and the peace it brings.

My journey took a professional turn towards finance. In college, I switched my major finance when I realized it was likely more profitable than political science. My career began in a corporate setting at a major bank, where I eventually became engrossed with personal finance, consuming every related book I could lay hands on. This passion sustained me and eventually guided me to apply for and take a lower-paying job as a paraplanner after my team was laid off at my corporate job. Here, I found my true calling. Being an introvert with little interest in bringing in clients, I thrived on strategizing and helping others achieve their financial goals with this more internal role, only meeting with clients to reveal their plan.

Here are 5 MAJOR financial pitfalls I see clients fall into that make my money hoarding self scream inside, along with strategies to avoid/fix them:

Living Someone Else’s Dream: Many people live lives shaped by others’ expectations or never pause to figure out what they truly want. It’s vital to take time for self-reflection to understand your own dreams and aspirations.
Unprofitable Investing: Investing in rental properties can seem like a smart move, but it’s crucial to evaluate the profitability realistically. I see many people buy real estate as in investment, make far less than if they put that money in the market, and also spend a lot of time dealing with tenants and maintenance. Another pitfall here is investing in anything that is too safe for the client’s risk tolerance. Many jump into investments that sounds great without actually running the numbers and figuring out if they would be better off with another option. You need to run the number, figure out your risk tolerance, and invest appropriately.
Relying on Future Inheritances: Planning financial stability around expected inheritances is risky. Many people even spend friviously knowing they will inherit money. Usually they inherit this money and it either less than they thought, or doesn’t carry them as far as they thought it would. It’s important to build independent financial security rather than depending on uncertain future gains.
Overspending on Children: It’s natural to want the best for your children, but excessive spending can lead to severe debt. I’ve seen people with big money issues who won’t take away their kid’s Mercedes because they want to uphold and image and don’t want their kids (or sometimes spouse) to realize they are broke. Setting realistic budgets and teaching kids about money can help mitigate this issue. Sometimes tough conversations need to happen if you have already dug yourself into a hole.
Chasing Unrealistic Dreams Without a Plan: Big dreams are wonderful, but without a concrete plan, they remain just that—dreams. Setting incremental goals and realistically assessing financial strategies are crucial to making dreams attainable. You cannot just will a great future, you need to plan for it.

Mastering the Work-From-Home Mom Life with Toddlers

As a work-from-home mom with a bustling household—including a lively 2-year-old and a curious 4-year-old in preschool—finding a balance between my professional responsibilities and family life is a finely tuned art. Here’s how I manage to get the best use of my time, ensuring everything gets done while nurturing a positive environment for my kids.

The Golden Hours of Deep Focus (8:30 AM – 10:45 AM)
The house is quiet when my kids are at preschool, and I’m in my element. These 2 hours and 15 minutes are precious—I dive deep into my most demanding tasks with zero distractions. It’s incredible how much you can accomplish when the workspace is peaceful!
Recharging with a Proper Lunch Break
After picking up my kids from school, we enjoy a relaxed lunch together around 11:30 AM. It’s our special time to chat about their morning and gear up for the afternoon. My regular lunch smoothie is always on the menu, giving me the perfect energy boost.
Balanced Screen Time
A bit of TV time post-lunch helps transition my kids into home mode. They engage with educational programs while I wrap up my workday. The flexibility of my schedule allows for productive bursts during this quite time.
Outdoor Adventures Every Day
Whether it’s sunny or chilly, outdoor play is a must. If I have leftover tasks, I set up my mobile office on the deck or by the window, keeping an eye on the kids as they explore and play in our yard. The fresh air does wonders for all of us!
Family Fitness Fun
Each afternoon includes a 30-minute workout session. I love that my kids see exercise as a regular part of life—they join in with their playful “workouts,” which might involve jumping on a trampoline or creating obstacle courses. It’s adorable and keeps us all active!
Cooking as a Team
Dinner preparation is a family affair. With a meal plan in hand, we tackle the kitchen together. My boys are eager helpers, from cracking eggs to mixing ingredients. It’s a great way to teach them about nutrition and teamwork.
Cherished Family Dinners
Every evening, we sit down as a family for dinner. This routine is the heart of our day, a chance for in-depth conversations and sharing.
Evening Unwind
Post-dinner, I clean up while my husband hits the workout room, and the kids invariably join him—loving their dad time. This gives me a quiet moment to myself, maybe catching up on a favorite show.
Bedtime Rituals
Our nighttime routine is soothing and structured, with bedtime stories and cuddles. By 7:45 PM, the kids are tucked in with the comforting sounds of white noise and the soft glow of a red light.
Time for Us
Once the kids are asleep, my husband and I wind down. Whether it’s catching up on a TV show or reading, this is our time to reconnect. We cherish these moments before our early lights-out, as my husband is up before 5:00 AM every day.

Balancing work and family life isn’t always easy, but it’s incredibly rewarding. Each day is a new opportunity to blend productivity with parenting, building a loving and efficient home environment.