From a young age, I’ve always gravitated towards what many might consider the unconventional or the unpopular. Growing up, this made me a bit of an outlier among my peers. I wasn’t the child who blended in easily, and I think that reality sculpted a very particular kind of resilience in me. It taught me the invaluable lesson that it’s perfectly fine not to follow the crowd. This realization has empowered me immensely as an adult, particularly in my journey as a mother.
Certainly, there were moments during my adolescence when I longed to fit in. I recall attempting to engage with the reality TV shows my peers were obsessed with, only to end up bewildered and uninterested. Even then, I was beginning to understand that fitting in just for the sake of being liked was less appealing than being true to my own tastes and interests.
As a parent, this acceptance of non-conformity has deeply influenced the choices I make for my children. I have made a few decisions for my boys that terrify me that they will be upset that they don’t fit-in later on. But, I knew when I made those decisions and I know now that I have made the best decisions for them that I could in those moments and we can adapt to their beliefs and choices as they grow. I just hope they don’t hate my one day for making a wrong choice for them.
Our family’s lifestyle also reflects our value of authenticity over social conformity. I work part-time to ensure I’m present during these formative years, and our boys attend a Montessori preschool, which we feel nurtures their individual strengths. We’re considering dual enrollment for elementary school to further tailor their educational journey. These are all things that cause quite a bit of strange comments from people who enjoys being “normal.” The only other parents who seem to understand me are those who also send their kids to same Montessori preschool.
We’ve opted out of typical vacationw and unnecessary purchases. Not because we disdain others who enjoy these things, but because it doesn’t fit with our family’s values and goals. We don’t use social media to share moments or milestones because the things we do, the travel we choose and the things we buy are purely because they are good for our family not because we care what others think about them. We share special moments on a private app for people close to use who care to see our day-to-day lives.
Looking back, I sometimes cringe at the discomforts of being the “weird kid,” but today, I’m thankful for her. She allowed me to grow into someone who values individual thought and who is comfortable making decisions that might not align with the mainstream. This sense of self, grounded in the acceptance of my quirks and the support of those who love me, underscores my contentment and confidence as a parent and individual.
In a world that often prizes conformity, choosing your own path can seem daunting. Yet, it is in this space where we find our true selves and the deepest, most meaningful way to connect with our families. After all, isn’t life about finding happiness in our unique journeys and sharing that joy with the ones we love, weird quirks and all?
Suburban Sprout 